Sorry, we took a break for all the festivities for Stacy's birthday (will blog that soon).
12 Days of Christmas, 2010
On the 5th Day of Christmas, the Cali Jones' gave to me...
5 Shelby stories
You want a Chicken Wing?
Shelby's pj's he wanted were in the dryer, so after his bath, he had on his hooded towel and was playing with his toy kitchen set. He said, "What would you like for dinner, Mommy?" I said, "I'd like spaghetti with meatballs, please." He got me the plate with little fake spaghetti with meatballs. He then said, "What would you like, Daddy?" Stacy replied, "I'd like bacon-wrapped filet mignon with a side of steamed asparagus." Shelby had this awful, confused look on his face. He threw his arms up in a 'who, me' kind of motion, head to the side, and said, "We don't got that...you wanna chicken wing?" It came with a real Texas accent, "chickun wang?"
I've got...Alabama
Shelby was sitting on the potty going poop, when he called me in. "Mommy, my tummy hurts. I've got....umm....umm...." I watched his brain search his vocabulary for words he'd recently learned and try to attach the right meaning. Finally, he had it. "....umm...I've got Alabama."
I couldn't stop laughing and told him, same difference, but the word he was looking for was diarrhea. I immediately texted our friend who's boyfriend was from Alabama, hence Shelby recently hearing the word, and broke the news to her. Not sure her boyfriend appreciated it....lol!
We got on the tramp!
At dinner the other night, Shelby was telling Janea (friend and babysitter) about our trip to Napa. He was trying to tell her about the tram that we took at the Sterling winery up into the mountains for wine tasting. It came out as such, "Janea, I got on a tramp, and I went up and down!" I couldn't explain that one fast enough.
We've got a snake problem here!
At the trip to Napa with Brian, Rebecca & Nina, we were coming back from dinner at the Rutherford Grill (fabulous, btw), and Shelby says, "Mommy, I have to got potty." He said he couldn't hold it, and it was about to come out. Grateful to have a boy, I asked Brian to pull over so Shelby could pee on the side of the road. It was dark, but Brian found a spot. We pulled over and Shelby and I got out. While peeing, he said, "Mommy, I think there's snakes out here." I assured him that I would be the first to be concerned about snakes, that it was too cold for snakes and we were fine. But, when we opened back up the van to get in, all Shelby announced was, "We got a snake problem out here!" I thought Brian was going to die laughing. Boys!
It's okay, Mommy...
I have yet to figure out how my son is soooo stinkin' brilliant at the age of 3 that he can manipulate me so well. Example: the other day I walked in on Shelby peeing on the floor! He was in the bathroom and had waited so long, he was in a rush to get it in the pot. He only lifted the cover, and not the toilet seat, so pee was going everywhere. I started yelling, "Shelby! What are you doing! Why are you peeing all over the floor!" I was fired up! We had company coming over any minute, and now I was unnecessarily scrubbing a bathroom floor. Damn these moments in motherhood where I just want to wring his little neck. He saw how pissed I was and said, "Mommy, God still loves me." I've taught him before that Mommy will ALWAYS love him, no matter what he does, but that sometimes I may not like him for the moment. So I said, "You'd better be glad God still loves you, Buddy, because right now Mommy doesn't like you!" Shelby said, "Wow, Mommy, those are really mean words." Crap....moment to feel like a complete ass. Ugh.... "You're right, Shelby, I'm sorry, Buddy. You know I always love you." His
reply was, "That's okay, Mommy." He patted me on the back while I was scrubbing the floor and walked away scott-free. Wait....what the hell just happened! Why am I the one asking for forgiveness when my kid just pissed all over the floor!
4 Karate Belts
3 Plane Tickets to Texas
2 World Series Tickets
...and a Big HOWDY from Cali!
NOTE: My Grandma gave me this a handful of years ago. She had carried it in her wallet since it was published and passed it on. Ah...the love of a grandparent. It manifests itself in the most touching of ways. 
